In his novel The Plot Against America, Philip Roth imagined
that Charles Lindbergh, an isolationist and an anti-Semite, ran for
president in 1940 and beat Franklin Roosevelt. In his novel
Fatherland, Robert Harris imagined a Britain that had succumbed
to the Nazis. These works are categorized as “alternate history.” Here
is my contribution to the genre: Sarah Palin becomes president of the
United States.
Far-fetched? Not really. After all, Palin was on the Republican
ticket, and the Democratic candidate was both untested nationally and
the first African American to claim the nomination. A significant
misstep here or there and the winner could have been John McCain, the
oldest man ever to be elected to a first term as president.
My brothers and sisters in punditry spent a jolly Fourth of July
weekend having a swell time with Palin and her decision to quit as
governor of Alaska. Her words were parsed for their meaning and her
plans were deduced, while political operatives of both parties analyzed
her move to see if she is really very clever or as dumb as a mud wall.
A good time was had by all.
It would behoove us, though, to consider how close we all came to
utter disaster. A recent Vanity Fair article clarifies just how
awful a vice president (or president) Palin would have made. During the
campaign, she proved allergic to briefings and remained determined to
stay uncorrupted by knowledge. More recently, she explained her
decision to — permit me some GOP talk — cut and run as
Alaska governor by lapsing into no known language, explaining herself
afterward in a burst of Tweets that only raised more questions. One
question, though, has been settled: She is unfit for office.
Naming Palin to the GOP ticket — a top-down choice by McCain
— was the most reckless decision any national politician has made
in the longest time, and while it certainly said something about
McCain, it says even more about his party. It has lost its mind.
Recall, after all, that Palin was not McCain’s first choice. That
was either Joe Lieberman or Tom Ridge. Both were rejected by the party
establishment because of their appalling moderation on social issues
over which the president has little direct authority anyway —
abortion, above all — and in Lieberman’s case because he had been
a Democrat. In desperation, McCain turned to Palin.
Was there a scream of protest? No. Did the Republican Party demand
to know of McCain what the hell he had done? Again, no. Was it okay
with the GOP if the person a heartbeat away from the presidency was
— pardon me, but it’s true — a ditz with no national
experience whatsoever? You betcha. The party had cracked up, accepting
a nullity because she was antiabortion over a seasoned senator and
former governor because they were not. Ideology won. The nation
lost.
Almost as interesting as Palin is South Carolina governor Mark
Sanford. Never mind his affair. These things happen. Concentrate
instead on how he hid his affair — by disappearing and calling
attention to himself. Note also that even before he somehow took the
Appalachian Trail to Buenos Aires, he was renowned for rejecting
federal stimulus money. Before that, as a congressman, he claimed to
have forsaken a housing allowance — and a cot — and said,
“I sleep on the floor of my office.” Most of us would consider this
weird behavior. In the GOP, it was seen as presidential timber.
Shall I go on? Newt Gingrich, another possible candidate, is the Old
Faithful of the Grand Old Party, erupting on a regular basis. He
recently suggested that Judge Sonia Sotomayor is racist because of her
comment about the innate astuteness of a “wise Latina.” He later
apologized, but his hair trigger is well established. This is the same
Gingrich who threw a tantrum in 1995 when President Bill Clinton seated
him in the rear of Air Force One and then, with ingenious malice
aforethought, failed to come back to chat. As for the other GOP
candidates, all of them must be vetted by the party’s Grand Inquisitor,
Rush Limbaugh, a belch from the gutter.
For Saturday Night Live‘s Tina Fey, Sarah Palin was comedic
material. For the rest of us, she’s been a summer weekend’s diversion.
But when the chuckling stops, you have to ask yourself what in the
world she was doing on the GOP ticket and what would have happened if
McCain had won. Only part of this is alternate history. The rest is
frightening reality.
Richard Cohen writes for the Washington Post Writers
Group.
