We interrupt this recession to bring you the NCAA Sweet 16 and party like it’s 1999. Welcome back to $6 beers, $200 hotel rooms, no-vacancies, and a 30-minute wait for a table. Thank you Ty Lawson, Blake Griffin, Jonny Flynn, Josh Heytvelt, and especially Roburt Sallie, who singlehandedly kept this tournament from being a bummer.

Since we’re revaluing everything from houses to newspapers to 401(k)s these days, let’s take a look at who’s worth what in big-time college and professional sports. And no wisecracks about them being the same thing.